My new sprained ankle, of course. And I've decided to include a few photogenic perspectives of said injury. You're welcome. (Note to self: clip toenails)
For more than 15 years involving every-day power walks (even some jogging), backpacking trips and various and sundry other activities involving feet, I have successfully avoided re-injuring a much-sprained left ankle--until Sunday morning. It was a simple mis-step over the edge of the asphalt on the way home (fortunately) over a route I've taken more than a thousand times. I went down.
I was somewhat (but only somewhat) comforted by the fact that it took place so early in the morning and on our rarely-traveled little road in order that I wouldn't have to pretend that I was examining insect behavior should someone drive by and wonder why I was sitting on the ground. A good five minutes passed before I could get up and hobble up the hill back home.
The first time it happened, I was in ninth grade and playing basketball. That one required a cast and crutches for six weeks. Countless other times, it was tennis (walking backward, stepping on a ball), softball, stairs, etc., etc. My left ankle is just permanently bigger due to all the scar tissue (instead of actual ligaments) that hold everything together in there.
This one looks to be about a "grade B", as they say. Not the worst, but definitely not just stretched. I heard the familiar snapping.
So. For something new, I'll try to do all the right stuff so as not to extend the healing process any longer than necessary blah, blah, blah. It's a hassle, but I'll live. Now, for some grins, I think we'll do a little police blotter:
[This is just one example of a type of call where insufficient meds might be an issue. I don't usually pull them because, well, it's unseemly to poke fun at mental illness, especially when the reports--as they so frequently seem to--involve "midgets"--an unfortunate term. But this one was so three-dimensional, I couldn't help it...]
"11:22 p.m.--A caller from the 800 block of Sutton Way reported her son was being pulled to the edge of a parking lot by people with faces that looked sick and pasty, like ghouls. They were also satanic looking, she added. The people look like they are from the east coast and work in the entertainment industry, and have a hiding place behind the bathrooms at a local pharmacy." [I love the "east coast" entertainment angle]
"12:16 a.m.--A man from the 25000 block of Highway 49 reported vandalism to a vehicle. He said he bought the car for his girlfriend and she then damaged it with a pick axe. He did not want to press charges." [wrong color?]
"9:20 a.m.--A caller from Sutton Way reported two boys throwing snowballs at vehicles. They were gone when officers arrived, but a stash of snowballs was located." [get prints]
[speaking of snow...]
"11:40 a.m.--A man from the 400 block of Broad Street reported a large amount of snow fell off a building onto his vehicle and totaled it." [Exactly which parking spot was that?]
"11:03 a.m.--A woman from the 17000 block of Old Downieville Highway reported she could not get a signal on her television. She was advised to clear the satellite dish with a broom." ["Hello, Nevada County Sheriff and Satellite Service...how may we help you?"]
"3:59 p.m.--A caller from the 300 block of Columbia Street reported his 8-foot long boa constrictor escaped and he didn't know where it was." [What, exactly, was that address, again?]
"9:12 a.m.--A caller from the 20000 block of Harlow Place reported a stray Chihuahua was causing issues." [Alert Homeland Security]
"2:43 p.m.--A woman from the 10000 block of Lime Kiln Road reported her neighbor stole her leaf blower. She said she had left it outside running to annoy the neighbor's barking Chihuahuas." [Ah. The escalation begins...]
"11:58 a.m.--A woman from the 200 block of Dorsey Drive reported her husband took her debit card and $40, then brought it back." [Right. I suspect there's a special file for these kinds of reports]
"10:01 a.m.--A caller from the 200 block of Northridge Drive reported the excessive ringing of a doorbell last night. A blanket was taken and silly string was sprayed on windows and a fence." [it's hard to resist a police report involving the words, "silly string"]
"4:11 p.m.--A man reported counting 37 cars that were driving without using windshield wipers during a heavy rain." [clearly, one can be too alert and concerned...]
"1:37 p.m.--A caller reported three youths about 16 to 18 years old standing on the corner of Richardson and North School Streets. They were 'looking down and seem very guilty.' Police could not find the youths." [Really? Because that was such a specific description and they obviously had been up to no good.]
One can only hope the Blotter will generally be less lame, next time...
